Review: Cosmic Love at the Multiverse Hair Salon by Annie Mare
WOW did I hate this book. Annie Mare please don't look at
this, you seem like such a cool person. But my God. Horrible. I had to
write a note to myself at like 6% that I would not DNF until at least
15%. By the time I got there, I was like eh maybe I am just being weird.
Might as well finish.
Folks, if you are not enjoying a book, it is not a failure to stop reading. Life is too short. Read something good.
Let's get into it.
SUMMARY:
Y'all what happened in this book. I guess I will just be short. Hairstylist named Tressa Fay is sitting in Tressa Fay's house with Tressa Fay's cat eating Tressa Fay's soup when Tressa Fay gets a message on Tressa Fay's phone from someone. Turns out that someone is six months in the past. Timey Wimey hijinks ensue, true love prevails, The End.
MY THOUGHTS:
I hate it here.
Why do they say everyone's name constantly? Why does the main character's name have to be Tressa Fay??
I hate the way this is written with 2016 millennial humor. Everything is so snappy and quippy and ugh. It is giving improv I am sorry.
Also, all the character's dialogue sounds the same??? Which is weird because the author goes into a lot of detail about how these characters are unique and have different personalities, but then they all feel identical. I could not care less about any of them.
Tressa Fay's dad was chill.
You can tell the author read several articles on physics and water. She then proceeds to throw this information at you in easily skippable chunks of dialogue. Like goodness the Linds' infodump at the beginning. What in the world.
The cat's name is Epinephrine. The nonbinary person is named Guy. What are these tryhard quirky names.
Another shoutout to Tressa Fay's dad. He was just Phil.
The book definitely wants to give you the experience of oooooh I don't know when things are happening everything is dreamy and whimsical. But it fails. It is just a jumbled mess.
I thought from the description Tressa Fay and Meryl (yes, the love interest's name is Meryl) were going to have to work together to solve Meryl's disappearance before it happened so that they could be together. But no, Meryl just needed to believe that friendship is magic or whatever.
Your mom is not dead dude chill. She is just in an interdimensional box where she is both alive and dead.
FINAL OPINION:
Man just like. Watch Star Trek. That will tell you the tale of two gay people finding their way to each other waaaaay better than this will. "At his side like you always have been and always will be" or whatever. I think I am so upset because of how excited I was to read this. Then it was just a slog. I am glad people seem to be enjoying it. I am glad there are books out there telling queer stories. I just wish this book had worked better for me.
Folks, if you are not enjoying a book, it is not a failure to stop reading. Life is too short. Read something good.
Let's get into it.
SUMMARY:
Y'all what happened in this book. I guess I will just be short. Hairstylist named Tressa Fay is sitting in Tressa Fay's house with Tressa Fay's cat eating Tressa Fay's soup when Tressa Fay gets a message on Tressa Fay's phone from someone. Turns out that someone is six months in the past. Timey Wimey hijinks ensue, true love prevails, The End.
MY THOUGHTS:
I hate it here.
Why do they say everyone's name constantly? Why does the main character's name have to be Tressa Fay??
I hate the way this is written with 2016 millennial humor. Everything is so snappy and quippy and ugh. It is giving improv I am sorry.
Also, all the character's dialogue sounds the same??? Which is weird because the author goes into a lot of detail about how these characters are unique and have different personalities, but then they all feel identical. I could not care less about any of them.
Tressa Fay's dad was chill.
You can tell the author read several articles on physics and water. She then proceeds to throw this information at you in easily skippable chunks of dialogue. Like goodness the Linds' infodump at the beginning. What in the world.
The cat's name is Epinephrine. The nonbinary person is named Guy. What are these tryhard quirky names.
Another shoutout to Tressa Fay's dad. He was just Phil.
The book definitely wants to give you the experience of oooooh I don't know when things are happening everything is dreamy and whimsical. But it fails. It is just a jumbled mess.
I thought from the description Tressa Fay and Meryl (yes, the love interest's name is Meryl) were going to have to work together to solve Meryl's disappearance before it happened so that they could be together. But no, Meryl just needed to believe that friendship is magic or whatever.
Your mom is not dead dude chill. She is just in an interdimensional box where she is both alive and dead.
FINAL OPINION:
Man just like. Watch Star Trek. That will tell you the tale of two gay people finding their way to each other waaaaay better than this will. "At his side like you always have been and always will be" or whatever. I think I am so upset because of how excited I was to read this. Then it was just a slog. I am glad people seem to be enjoying it. I am glad there are books out there telling queer stories. I just wish this book had worked better for me.
Thank you to NetGalley and Berkley Publishing Group for the ARC! All opinions are my own.
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